May 2, 2010

  • How can I have such a nice weekend and feel this way? Instead of sitting at the desk attempting to concentrate on my sudoku book I wish I could turn off the lights crawl under the desk with a blanket over my head while I cry. Suffer in silence, my way of life it seems. I looked up a few more dr.s, The problem is that I have to send out emails because I cannot call to ask if they know of any organization/person that works on a very discounted or pro bono rate. I am so desperate that I know I would be a crying blubbering idiot seconds after introducing myself. I worked with dr.s I know they hardly have time for emails so who knows when I will get a reply. Even going in there I know it would be the same as a phone call. I want to just go sit in their office and beg for help, please help I would beg as tears stream down my face. I just want to be ok, I want be happy, I cannot go on like this. I don't want to die but I can't afford to pay. Please, please help me before I get so lost in these feelings I never come back out. Please I cannot do it alone anymore, I would beg.

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